A Pack of Gum

Oh the woes in the quest for gainful employment.  It seems as though those first few days are sparkly and bright with optimism.  First, you only apply to those jobs that are lucrative and almost a dream-come-true type opportunity.  All other listings seem boring and not worthy of your time to apply.  Then as the weary days come and go, self-introspection begins.  Is it my resume?  Is it my cover letter?  Maybe I forgot to dot the "i's" or cross the "t's."  Soon the less than appealing jobs seem more and more appealing.  Sure, I will work part-time!  Sure, I will work weekends!  You want to pay me an impoverish wage? Sure, I will work for pennies! Everything and anything becomes more and more appealing.  And all was appealing until the moment I hit a government advertisement for what seemed like a great opportunity.  Working for the police department.  As I read the details a horrible sentence popped out at me and my heart skipped a beat, "All applicants will have to go under a polygraph test."  WTF? A polygraph test? Immediately my mind went to OMG, I wonder what the questions are?  As my thoughts raced, I pictured the interview going as follows:

Polygrapher:  Have you ever cheated on anything?
Me:  Define cheating?  Because I have cheated on my diet, I have cheated myself out of opportunities.  Um, how far back does this question go?  High school?  

Polygrapher: Have you ever done anything illicit?
Me:  (Heart is racing, beads of sweat are building on my forehead)  Define illicit?  Behaviors? Um, I think I have.  That doesn't ruin my chances does it?

Polygrapher:  Ma'am have you ever broken the law?
Me:  Oh crap (sweat is rolling off my forehead now) um, ya. You don't need details, do you?

Polygrapher:  Have you ever stolen anything?
Me: Crap, yes, when I was seven I stole a pack of Bubblicious Bubble Gum, strawberry flavor if you wanted to know! (Which my mother's eagle eye caught me and made me go back inside the store and give it back to the scary cashier man)

Polygapher:  Have you ever been convicted of a crime?
Me:  Thank God, NO!  (A little sigh of relief escapes)

And so on and on the questions go.  Delving into my inconspicuous past. Making me dredge up all my wrong-doings.  All my faults.  Geez, this job doesn't seem as appealing anymore! Then I had to sit back, take a deep breath and let it out. And then something happened.

A peace came over me. 

Yes, I do have a past.  Some of it good, some of it bad.  But if it were not for the past, I would not be who I am today.  No, I am not perfect today.  But I have also learned from my past and take those teachings into my future. And a smile came across my lips, because when I think about God being a polygrapher, I don't have to sweat and my heart doesn't have to race, because He already knows the answer to every one of those questions.  And He is still here with me.  





Live Large and Be Free!